Should You Really Marry Your Baby’s Father?

Marriages are made in heaven, but we are responsible for the maintenance work.[1]

One of the biggest questions on an unwed pregnant teen’s mind is ‘Should I marry the father of my baby?’ If you are one of those girls asking yourself that very question, then this article is just for you.

Marriage should be a carefully weighed decision. You are going to spend the rest of your life with this person and the least you can do is to give thought to how compatible you are with your partner, spiritually and mentally.  The following poem is a sad yet accurate description of how most youngsters get married today and how their marriage turns out:

Nice night in June. Stars shine. Big moon.

In park with girl. Heart pound. Head swirl.

Me say love. She coo like dove.

Me smart. Me fast. Me don’t let chance pass.

Get hitched me say. She say okay.

Wedding bells ring. Honeymoon. Everything.

Settle down. Happy life. Happy man. Happy wife.

Another night in June. Stars shine. Big moon.

Me not happy anymore. Carry baby. Walk the floor.

Wife mad. She stew. Me mad. Stew too.

Life one big spat. Nagging wife. Bawling brat.

We realize at last, we moved too fast.[2]

Consider your true motives for wanting to marry the father of your baby: Are you doing it out of love for the man or just to save yourself from the embarrassment of remaining an unwed woman? Are you both confident of your abilities to raise your baby and be good role models? Marriages should not be based on your convenience but based on your true love for each other. If you are marrying for the wrong reasons, with a baby on the way, you already have a lot going against you. Statistics prove that couples who get married because a baby is on the way have a higher chance of failure than those marriages based on a solid foundation of love, faith, and trust. Don’t make a hasty or poorly thought decision.

It takes a lot of maturity, mental and financial stability, and sacrifices to raise a child. Are you confident that you and your boyfriend have what it takes? If not, why don’t you consider adoption as a wonderful alternative to ensuring that your child grows up in the best of environments?  An adoptive family will serve as good role models for your child and provide the healthy image of marriage that every growing child finds security in. Spend some time in prayer, asking God today to help you make the right decision that focuses on the future of your child.


[1]Robert J. Morgan, Nelson’s Complete Book of Stories, Illustrations, and Quotes, electronic ed., 529 (Nashville: Thomas Nelson Publishers, 2000).

[2]Robert J. Morgan, Nelson’s Complete Book of Stories, Illustrations, and Quotes, electronic ed., 531 (Nashville: Thomas Nelson Publishers, 2000).

About Lifetime Christian Adoption

Since 1986, adoption expert Mardie Caldwell has been dedicated to bringing couples and birth parents together in order to fulfill their dreams.
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